Friday, August 3, 2007

Bringing new meaning to the term I gave my blood, sweat and tears...

I have been meaning to write about this for a few days, but I was reminded again by a conversation I had with my co-worker last night. I am not the only person who has it rough financially, nor am I the only one whose love for their family, drives them to do things that maybe they would rather not... My coworker that works in my department at Wally World aka W.M. loves to tell me stories about her granddaughters whom she loves very much. Every night it is "my granddaughters this and my granddaughters that." I think it is wonderful that she loves her granddaughters so much. She has told me numerous times how if it wasn't for the love that she had for her granddaughters she would be living a different life. You see, she is currently living with her daughter who is about my age, and is supporting her daughter (who is a single parent) and her two granddaughters. Everything she does centers around them and she does not have much time to herself. She does not like working at Wally World, but she has been there for about 5 years and if she were to start over again at another retail store she would be making a few dollars less, and she is barely making ends meet now. I was stunned to find out that she has been literally not just giving her sweat and tears for her family, but her blood as well... We were talking about another co-worker the other night, and she mentioned that she saw her at the blood bank. I lightheartedly asked my coworker what she was doing at the blood bank, and she replied, " I was giving blood to get a little money, so that I could get the girls some pampers and things." I was shocked and I got a little misty-eyed. I think it is horrible that some people struggle and struggle to make ends meet and it is never enough. Rather than just being able to give blood for the benefit of just helping to save someone else's life, some people may have to give blood in order to keep on living their own humble lives. She confides in me often about her hopes and disappointments in her life and her daughter's life. I have met her daughter a couple of times, and I think that her daughter deep down really loves her mother and is disappointed in herself, but I think she is the type of person, that needs an outside support system to help her realize, that is not too late; that she can still do something with her life. Sometimes people get depressed about their life and for a long time they feel pinned down and cannot move. I think that is what her daughter is experiencing right now. Some nights she cries and says to me, " I wish my daughter could be more like you." I try to tell her that I am not much to be glorified because I am not in school right now and I have not been able to achieve my goals yet, and that her daughter GOD-willing, will arrive at a better place someday soon. She says to me, " But you have your priorities in order and you have your head on straight." She tells me I have an old soul...I am not sure if I can grasp that. But I think she understands that if things had worked out the way I thought they would, I would have finished school by now. I want to get better; I want to pay back my parents (whom I am still staying with) for what they have done for me. In some people's eyes it is not enough, but in my eyes, it is all they could give, and money is not the most important thing to supply a child with. My mother went to school on and off for years while taking breaks to raise her kids, and when she finally graduated a few years ago at about age 43 with her two associate degrees, it was the most proudest day of my life. I felt so proud of my mom. Even my brothers were getting teary-eyed, one of my brother's screamed, "mom!" so loud when the MC called her name to get her diplomas. The guy sitting next to us looked at him, and my brother said, "That's my mom right there!" She may not know how much her kids love her and how proud we are of her, but we do, and we are very proud for what she has done, even if it is not much in her eyes. Hopefully one day when I have invited her to read this blog-journal she will understand the respect and love that I have for her even if I don't show it enough. Mum I love you and someday I hope to make you proud and I will attempt to repay your kindness and love you have given over the years. Thank you for enduring me in your womb and giving birth to me. I say thank you and give praise to the Most High for creating you, and thank you to your mother for having you; I LOVE YOU....

4 comments:

insanly insane said...

hey!!
i was just browsing around and found your blog. i really like what you write...come and visit me in my blog :]
ayelet. xxx <3

Tatiana V said...

Wow, you really made me cry with your post! I loved how you described everything, the struggle of the older lady, you, her daughter, your mum, and the love and the gratitude you feel for her! Thanks a lot, your post deserves STARS !

EclecticEffluence said...

Yes, many props to people who do what they have to in order to make life better for others.

People call me an old soul as well. Its a compliment.

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